Number 1
I found out that Monday is a holiday and my office is closed. A three day weekend is much needed, right now. I had plans to climb and salsa dance on Friday night, but I canceled. The only thing on my schedule this weekend is a meeting with Adam to go over our budget and my application materials for attending the subtle energy school. I�m excited about this.

Number 2
Yes, we make appointments with each other. It may sound silly, but we find it to be incredibly useful. Practically speaking, fewer things get overlooked. This alleviates a lot of anxiety, for me. It�s the whole growing up without any parental structure thing. I�m constantly living in fear of being carried off in the wind because some crucial box was left unchecked.

Personally speaking, it helps us get a better sense of satisfaction and balance in the relationship. It�s less likely that either one of us will look back and think, �Hey! We hardly ever do what I want to do, anymore. My priorities are being forgotten!� So, when we�re both feeling good and balanced and emotionally prepared for some real life planning, we sit down and make a schedule that accommodates both of our needs and desires. We get to do everything we want, and as often as we want.

Number 3
I�ve been feeling like an emotional wreck, lately. Usually, when I�m feeling down, the first thing I do is hit junk food, and I hit it hard. Today, I went to Whole Foods to pick up lunch. In their hot foods bar, they had a huge trough of delectable looking pasta and cheese dish (it was mac and cheese, but not made with mac). It was all gooey and warm with brown, crusty cheese edges. I thought to myself, �If there is a time that I should be allowed to indulge, this would be it.�

I couldn�t do it, though. It wasn�t because I don�t think I�m entitled to it, or because I�m sticking to any pre-determined diet, it was because I thought about how a dose of high-carb, high-fat food would make me feel after it was over.

Also, since giving up dairy, cheese just doesn�t do it for me, anymore. I read somewhere that cheese actually has some addictive properties, which makes it especially hard to give up. I don�t know if I believe that or not, but looking back at my cheese eating days, I definitely feel like I was under some kind of spell. Was it a dairy addiction? I guess anything is possible.

By, �how it would make me feel,� I don�t mean on an emotional level. Food-guilt is lost on me. I know that sounds weird coming from someone who is practically a vegan, but really. I know that given my dietary choices, I could get really self-righteous about it, but I�m too honest for that. Certain foods are just repugnant to me. It�s as if a normal person turned down human eye-ball stew, after he noticed it staring up at him, and then tried to act as if the only thing stopping him was his virtue and self-discipline.

Anyway, by �how it would make me feel,� I meant physically. I generally avoid carb heavy lunches on work days because by 3PM, I�ll be falling asleep at my desk. High fat foods tend to unsettle my stomach. Junk food doesn�t propel me like I need to be propelled, anymore. Maybe it�s an age thing. Maybe that was always the case, and it�s a self-awareness thing. All I know is that my eating has been improving in a totally natural and comfortable away.

I�m not giving up chocolate, though. That�s just talking crazy (I switched to vegan chocolate, for most of the time).

1 comments so far

Thursday, Feb. 16, 2012 at 1:04 PM